Dr-Fix-It! Notebook Archive:
More Things That Make You Say Hmm

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• Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have any film.
• He who laughs last . . . thinks slowest.
• A day without sunshine is like . . . well, night.
• Change is inevitable; except from a vending machine.
• They tell me I should back up my hard drive but I can't find the 'Reverse'.
• He was 'lost in thought'. . . Because it was unfamiliar territory.
• When the chips are down, perhaps the buffalo is empty.
• Been there. Done that. Got the T-shirt. Can't remember most of it.
• He who lives by the sword gets shot by someone who doesn't.
• He's always late, in fact, his ancestors arrived on the Juneflower.
• You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted in a tabloid headline.
• Did you ever wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges?
• Bumper sticker: 'Honk if you love peace and quiet'
• Bumper sticker: ' Pardon my driving, I'm reloading'
• Despite the cost of living, have you noticed how it remains so popular?
• Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.
• It is hard to understand how a cemetery can raise its burial costs and blame it on the higher cost of living.
• Just remember. if the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off.
• The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.
• If you lined up all the cars in the world end to end. . . there would always be one jerk who would to try to pass them.
• You can't have everything! Where would you put it?
• The latest survey shows that 3 out of 4 people make up 75% of the world population.
• If the shoe fits, get another one just like it.
• The things that come to those that wait may be the things left by those who got there first.
• Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day drinking beer making up lies.
• FLASHLIGHT: A case for holding dead batteries.
• The shinbone is a device for finding furniture.
• A FINE is a tax for doing wrong. A TAX is a fine for doing well.
• It was recently discovered that research causes cancer in rats.
• Everybody lies, but it doesn't matter since nobody listens.
• I wished the buck stopped here. I could use a another one.
• I started out with nothing. Fortunately, I still have most of it.
• Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.